Sunday, September 16, 2007

Bus Girl

There's something really strange about wearing clubbing clothes outside of the clubbing district. Like while waiting, in actual daylight, at a bus stop in the sleepy neighborhood in which one lives. And whilst on said bus, once it arrives.

And when you are fond of the type of outlandish footwear that I am, doubly so.

Perhaps the people on this bus with me don't realize that I can see their glares.

Another problem with being a bus girl who lives in a sleepy old person neighborhood who therefore needs to take relatively long bus trips to get to dinner and clubbing venues has to do with the limited purse size that one can reasonably take to a club. Ordinarily when I'm on a bus, say going to work or shopping or meeting a friend for coffee, I take a big canvas bag with me. Said bag will stow such things as my lunch, travel mug and importantly, a book. I do almost all of my reading on the bus. I've trained myself to read books on the bus. But I can't very well bring a big ole canvas bag to a club, now can I? And club purses are minuscule. It's an unspoken rule of clubbing, like that the skankiest girl in the bar will inevitably be the one wearing the white Daisy Duke shorts with stiletto heels1. My club purse will hold my camera & Treo2, but not much else. I can't even fit my wallet into my club purse - I just take the necessary cards3 and some cash. Oh yes, and my iPod and a lipstick. These are all tiny items, especially in comparison to a book.

So what's a girl to do to keep herself occupied on the bus? Write a blog entry on her Treo, of course! On her Treo's wee little keyboard. Boy, she sure wishes that she had this spiffy fold out keyboard that would allow her to type on a full-sized keyboard on her Treo, but yet will fold up so small that it will fit even in her tiniest of club purses. She really hopes that Santa will bring her one for Christmas.

Hint hint.

1For the record, I don't even *own* a pair of white Daisy Duke shorts.

2my still *nameless* Treo, by the way.

3driver's license, Care Card4, credit & debit cards

4Clarification for my Ontarian readers, this is the BC equivalent of an OHIP card. For my American readers, we have this thing in Canada called universal health care - you carry around a card and the government pays your medical bills. You should try it out. I always bring my CareCard with me. Being superstitious, I feel it is a talisman against my becoming sick or injured and thus *needing* to have my CareCard with me.

6 comments:

Kalev said...

Okay, you cannot footnote footnotes! Enough of that insanity.

Second, I don't think that keyboard will work, will it? Does the Treo have infrared? Wouldn't you rather get a bluetooth keyboard? No stupid thing to line-up then.

Beth said...

You can footnote footnotes, Kalev. Havent you read any David Foster Wallace?

The bluetooth ones are waaay more expensive, so I thought I'd give Santa a break and ask for the cheaper one.

And the Treo does, in fact, have infrared, which I know because I have beamed a certain Palm app with it... a Palm app which shall be blogged about soon (so don't spoil it... 'cuz I think you know the one I mean!!)

Jorge said...

Can't you just use your Treo to read books?

Beth said...

Damn you, Jorge! Stop making sense!!

And I have like 500 e-books on my computer that I could put on my Treo. Damn it!

JB said...

As a true bibiophile I've got to draw the line on "e books". Books are too perfect a human invention to fuck with.

tree ho said...

I've had some good luck with Plucker for book reading - it's good for casual bus reading but not so much for textbooks. Also it turns itself off if you fall asleep reading!

I guess the super duper nerdy keyboard kind of neutralizes the kittenishness of the clubwear, eh?